Start 10 simple rules of dating my daughter

10 simple rules of dating my daughter

Any type of romantic movie theme is strictly prohibited. Rule #9 If you lie to me about anything I will find out.

Also, I have a very large yard with an over-sized shovel. My daughter is an extension of me and if you underestimate me than you are definitely underestimating her.

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The same goes for your wandering eyes, if they go anywhere below eye level I will ask you to leave the premises as soon as possible, if you do not comply I will take action that I feel is necessary (i.e. Rule #3 I am aware that the so-called latest fashion trends mean that you wear your jeans several sizes too big so that your underwear shows or that you wear jeans known as "girl pants" for boys that are so tight they contour every area of your lower extremities and also expose your underwear.

Please don't be embarrassed but you look ridiculous and so do your friends.

Must agree that life is a compilation of elusive little truths that, when piled up like sugar cubes, form the foundation on which everything else in the universe rests. When watching "Wheel of Fortune," must be able to shout outlandish, nonsensical answers that aren't even close. Earlier this year, the 300-pound beagle signed up for Obamacare. He seems to see the vet on a weekly basis now: for fleas, anxiety, warts, depression, insomnia, gout, gallstones, sex addiction, itching, incontinence, low blood sugar, hot flashes and the occasional but aesthetically...

Earlier this year, the 300-pound beagle signed up for Obamacare. He seems to see the vet on a weekly basis now: for fleas, anxiety, warts, depression, insomnia, gout, gallstones, sex addiction, itching, incontinence, low blood sugar, hot flashes and the occasional but aesthetically... Must be able to absorb $100,000 in daughter's college debt without holding a grudge or feeling like you saved half of Europe from starvation. Must be willing to advise me on various harebrained business ventures, such as my latest: Selling hemp hats to disgruntled hipsters. Must know how to tell a joke: A bear walked into a bar ...

If you think that you will have opportunities to explore your sexual activity with my daughter you will find out that I will be the only type of birth control that you will need.